My experiences with a year of change

 

Normally, I like to write something of a general nature, but this time I'm getting inspiration to write something personal. 

As we come towards the end of the calendar year, I had a thought to reflect on how it went. Definitely not as planned! and not easy, but one with a lot of growth! and realization. I realized that a lifelong passion for me is in the area of healing (physical and mental). 

The focus was mainly on using time, available resources, gaining wisdom. I went to India to visit family and was supposed to return in March. But pandemic happened, and I got stuck in India. So, you are with family pretty much and going to work from home - you'd guess it's easy right! - unfortunately it wasn't in my case. 

I was working in a team based in San Diego, CA which had just gotten off the ground and we had just started to put in the performances after gaining experience. I had calls with my teammates on how to manage this. After some thought, the conclusion that came to me was even though hard, the best way forward is to work remotely at San Diego time (11.5 hours off India Time). Somehow the workload increased dramatically, and we were all remote. I was super remote! without access to my machines. 

My work time would start at around 8pm and I'd be working until around 3 30 to 4 45am depending on the workload. I thought my body would take it, but it started warning me after it took a heavy load (around 3 months). I'd sort of adjusted for a few weeks, but once we started having 9 am India time meetings for a week, it kind of started to give in to the stress. At one stage, I didn't have a proper sleep time, my body didn't know when to sleep and when to eat. Add to that no sunlight due to working at odd times and a disturbed sleep. In between, I got my MBA admit from a top school with a 25% scholarship (which is amazing!) , but they also had some of their pre start programs at an odd time for me! .. the result really was not enough nourishment, sleep and sunlight, which ironically is opposite to what we expect when we visit home. The real positive thing though was that I was at home on my Birthday after a really long time..

Now for the lessons, because I was working when there wasn't any noise, I realized how much we crave for calmness. We are all shown by society to move towards exciting things, but the happiness you feel when it's calm is just not comparable. And yes, scientifically speaking, alcohol shuts down your senses which calms you down but with negative after-effects. That's why it's not a reason for overindulgence in it. Being calm is a skill that I have tried to develop this year to some extent. 

After a tough 3 months, and a not so comfortable flight back to San Diego, I finally was able to work in the mornings! without feeling uncomfortable if the team needed my input when I was sleeping. My MBA started too. University of California system follows a quarter system. I'd done all my courses in places that followed semester system. Basically these people cover 6 months of syllabus in 3 months. Work wasn't getting any lighter... This is where I just had to cut out certain things which I didn't have much time for. I do not know what played on Netflix and amazon ! 

The big realization was if I just prioritized my time to the things that really mattered, a lot of things would be manageable. We are much more capable than we think. Then slowly I could add a few extra things too.. I started a meditation practice to try to become calmer. I don't think I could have managed the last 3 months otherwise. Meditation gave me much more deeper insights into a whole new set of things that can't even be explained in words with the current scientific terms. A shout out to all my MBA classmates for helping get through this quarter, especially my team who were there on the task for every assignment. 

Also to the people. Just know that if I did spend time with you this year, you really really matter to me :) :D... 

There's a lot more that I learnt that I will write on another post. I will also start writing on a book on healing just because it's one of my passions! and I discovered some natural abilities there.. I'll sign off here and hope you all had a great learning 2020!....

 


 


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